Monday, February 14, 2011

BAD MOVIE REVIEW: Alligator (1980) [Bad Movie Battle Royale Contender]

I knew going into Alligator that I was probably in for a pretty good time. I've heard from several sources that this movie is actually quite a bit of fun and it turns out they're all right! The internet is always a shaky resource when it comes to opinions. But it turns out that they were right. Alligator has got it going on.

Happy Valentine's Day!

This happens FREQUENTLY during the movie. Just when the story is trying to progress too much and become boring...BAM! Alligator shows up and eats somebody. I'll be damned if it isn't just the greatest thing you ever did see.

Watching Alligator kind of brings some memories of Jaws. I would have a hard time calling this a there is very little that it rips from Jaws. But you can still claim that it tries to clone it. There's lots of POV shots of the Alligator stalking its prey...and it has pretty similar music playing while its doing so. But unlike see lots of Gator.

I'm sorry, Ramon. The Alligator's name is Ramon.

He was flushed down a toilet you see. Some little girl got him after watching a man get brutally attacked by a larger one at a Gator show. She gets it home and her abusive father flushes it down the toilet while she's away. Several years later she studies gators professionally and is recruited by the police department to help them track down the massive gator and have sex with the police officer in charge.

Yes. This movie knows what the audience wants to see.

That is more or less what's going on. But actually the majority of the story is told from the police officer's side. His history, his life, etc. He has a tendency to get his partner's killed and it happens again. Only noone really believes its an alligator. Until its too late...

Maybe they should have called this movie "Alley Gator."

The effects department does one hell of a job in my opinion. Not only is the massive gator not that bad up close but when it goes terrorizing the town it's a hoot! They built several city models and show a REAL alligator walking around them and knocking things over. It's really cool. I was deeply impressed.

Alright, I could go on all day about how much I loved this movie. If you're looking for something similar to Jaws but with cooler ALLIGATOR edge, this movie is for you. I'd just buy it. But the sequel...I don't know about that one. It does star Dee Wallace, so maybe its not so bad...

And now, for the dozens in attendance...LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!

Allow me to explain the Bad Movie Battle Royale for those of you that missed my original post or are reading this review many months down the road. I am pitting 10 movies against one another in a death match of doom! This is the second of the ten. Each time I watch one of them I will create a wrestling character from the Nintendo 64 game: WWF No Mercy that coincides with the film. Enter: Alligator

Strength: 10 (THE JAWS OF DOOM!)
Speed: 2 (Although he has short bursts of quickness...overall he's pretty slow)
Endurance: 7 (He can go a long time...cuz he does it at a snails pace)
Agility: 6 (You'd be surprised what gators can do when they're hungry)
Offensive: 10 (THE JAWS OF DOOM!)
Defense: 7 (A very strong hide...but there's still many devastating weak points)
Recovery: 4 (He takes his sweet time healing. But he can take damage so its all good)
Bleeding: 5 (He's tough but he bleeds a lot.

Overall, Alligator rates an average: 6.38 (nnniiiiicccceeee)

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