Wednesday, October 27, 2010

The Super Mega Ultra Awesome All Day Halloween Horrorthon 2010!!

God bless you Dead Alive.

Welcome Reality friends! This is Halloween Horrorthon 2010. Or rather, it will be in a few days. Halloween is that special time of year that I can have my evil and enjoy it too. Mother nature is killing itself, she's getting colder than an Alaskan fridge out there, and I'm forced, FORCED I TELL YOU! to stay inside and watch movies.

Halloween Horrorthon all started 7 years ago. It was 2003, and I just moved out of the boonies and into some stranger's basement in the big city. It was at this time that I was shy, oblivious to the vast greatness of the internet, and I had absolutely ZERO friends. But I was ok with that, being an only child I am used to it. So Halloween came and I had nothing to do. So I figured...what the hell, I'll go rent some movies that I've never seen before and give it a go. (And at the time I was a complete Horror newb so the world was my oyster) So I picked up Return of the Living Dead, 28 Days Later, Alien, and Cabin Fever. I watched them all, and low and behold, it was the greatest night of my life. So I did it again the next year, and the year after that, and the year after that, and then on the 5th year I kicked it up a notch with more movies, and the year after that I started doing themes, and then the next year...I was smack in the middle of buying a house so I was too stressed out to care about themes...but here we are, YEAR EIGHT, and I'm back in the saddle BABY!!!1!

(For a little more history and a complete list of the movies I've watched on Horrorthon, check out my OLD website here.)

The Rules:
  1. All movies must be movies that are actually GOOD. I watch a lot of bad movies and Halloween is a special day, set aside for only the best of the best.
  2. There must be a minimum of THREE movies to constitute a horrorthon.
  3. Horrorthon MUST take place on Halloween, no exceptions! (The only exception being if Halloween lands on a Friday or Saturday...then I must drink wildly and make Horrorthon hangover day)
  4. All movies HAVE to be movies that I have never seen before. (This rule is the heart and soul of Horrorthon. It is the reason for its existence and I can never stray from it...for fear of it turning into a Gremlin)
So let's begin. I'm not exactly sure how this is all going to play out on the actual day of Horrorthon. Ideally, I'll watch all of these movies, and review them as I watch them, updating you of what's going on. BUT, there is a possibility that I'll have GUESTS for the first time in Horrorthon history, so that may be a no go. At the very least, I promise all of you that there will be periodic updates ON THIS BLOG throughout Halloween day. So check back all day to see how its going and to see just how insane I make myself. This year is the longest Horrorthon to date and it's going to be incredible.

Halloween Horrorthon 2010: Killer Baby Edition!

The theme this year happened for 2 reasons: I wanted to see Grace and Rosemary's Baby...and my fiance suggested I have a killer baby night...and from there it exploded. I'm always surprised at how many films you can find for any particular theme if you google it enough. So allow me to introduce you to the players of Halloween Horrorthon 2010:

The Main Event

This movie is OWND!

Although NOT the final movie I'll be watching, it is the purpose and inspiration for this year's Horrorthon. It has always been a movie I've wanted to see and everyone says its a classic, so that is why it is here.

The Referral

This movie is on Netflix Instant Watch!

I have a friend. And she won't shut up about this movie. She swears up and down it kicks copious amounts of ass. And I respect and trust her judgement, therefore Grace makes the 'Thon.

The Dust Mite

This movie is OWND!

I bought It's Alive months ago...maybe even years ago. I think I bought it at Circuit City actually now that I think about it. They went out of business forever ago. It's been sitting on the shelves for quite some time and it needs to be watched. Severely. (Although this has the possibility for badness, I think it'll be good.)

The Slave

This movie is OWND!

It is called the slave because it was not my first choice...or really my choice. I told my fiance about it and it was forced upon me to include it. For one reason and one reason only: Johnny Depp. And I'm ok with that, I can take it. Besides...the cover kind of makes it sound like its Rosemary's Baby...in space (on Earth). Awesome.

The Mystery Movie

This movie...is somewhere...

This movie I want to see really fucking bad...but I don't think I'll be able to get it. Netflix had it...then someone rented it. (I'm looking at YOU VINCENT.) Now it's on the "short wait" list and I doubt the rental store will have it. FUCK! This movie is about a chick at a carnival that has some creature invade her vagina and then forces her to kill people. GOD DAMMIT THAT'S THE GREATEST SYNOPSIS I'VE EVER HEARD!

We'll see I guess. Mystery Movie.

The Freak Nasty

This movie had better be at Blockbuster.

Another one Netflix fucked me on. It just came out in 2007, and I remember seeing it everywhere, so it's got to be available for renting. I'll find it, I swear because this is another one that I'm dying to see. Like Baby Blood, this is a French film...but that's where the similarities end. In this movie a woman's life is invaded by a crazy woman that's after the first woman's baby...still in the womb. And she'll get it at any cost. Yep...that's a scissor in the poster art. I've heard very gruesome things about this movie. CAN'T. WAIT!

The Wild Card

This movie is on Netflix Instant Watch!

Alright, I'm not gonna lie...this is a bad movie. Everyone on IMDb says they enjoyed the hell out of it so why not? And I can't possibly walk away from a movie with a Burgess Meredith cameo and this synopsis:
When Karen tries to have a tumor removed, she discovers it's actually the deformed fetus of an ancient Native American shaman ready to be reincarnated. Soon, the evil spirit bursts forth, and Karen turns to a sham psychic and a contemporary medicine man for a showdown with the murderous creature.
Oh fuck yes. And it stars Tony Curtis! LOVE IT!

AND FINALLY...

The Ace in the Hole

This movie is OWND!

Alright, not exactly a "baby" movie but there is a young girl so that's good enough for me. AND, I seriously bought this movie 3 years ago and never watched it. I've heard it's amazing but I've been knee deep in the Carnosaur trilogy so give me a break. Actually, I've wanted to save it for Horrorthon. And finally after 3 years, it's happening.

So what do you think? Have you watched any of these? (If you have don't spoil it for me, or I'll send my army of baby zombies to eat your brains through your eye sockets.) I think this year has the potential to be the greatest even though I've already broken 25% of my Horrorthon rules. I don't know if anything can top the 4th year when I discovered Re-Animator for the first time, but I have a feeling that this year will give THAT year a run for its money.

I can't wait. Halloween kicks so much ass.

6 comments:

  1. Make sure you don't rent Inside from Blockbuster. Their copy is edited. Make sure you get the unrated one. Blockbuster is a sham. I'm sure you can find it just heed my warning. No Blockbuster.

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  2. Now just because I have Netflix and have watched movies like The Stink of Flesh and I have a blog where I occasionally post crazed death porno doesn't automatically make a me a prime suspect for renting a movie about vaginal parasites with murderous impulses.

    Your words hurt, Gable :(

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  3. G&G - thanks for the tip. Unless I come across it over the next couple of days I might have to resort to Blockbuster. I don't want to but I might have to.

    Vincent - I was hoping you HAD rented it, then I'd know who had it and you could just mail it to me. Besides, if you had rented it you would have gained like 50 awesome points...easily. But I'll give you 10 just because I feel bad.

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  4. your never going to want to have children after this marthon

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  5. Don't feel bad, man. My clumsy attempt at humor failed. I shoulda left out that last sentence. Unhappy faces should only be used by pros.

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  6. lol, I figured so...but it was all about the sadface. lol. I don't want to be upsettin my Reality peeps.

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