BAD MOVIE REVIEW: She-Creature (2001)

We have all thought at one point or another that someone should make a movie about an evil mermaid.  We all know that someone should, right?  It's only the next logical step in horror cinema!  Well you and I will be damned because it happened...twice!

I'll be honest, I was originally flagged to see this movie after reading a review from on the internets. The plot sounded promising and interesting.  After eyeing it on the shelf for sale at the old run down video dump down the road I picked it up and thought what the hell.  Little to my surprise did I get way more than I bargained for.

First off, She-Creature is part of a series of films done by a film group called Creature Features.  They do what I've been saying for years on how to remake movies.  They take old 50's cheesy horror films and give them a polished update.  I think its absolutely wonderful.  Nobody's pissed because their treasured icon (I.E. Freddy) isn't pissed on and redone to our dissatisfaction.  In all respect to the original these films are past due and the current movie watcher probably has no idea they exist.  The best part about Creature Features is that it is run by the special effects master that did Aliens & Jurassic Park...Mr. Stan Winston!  So you know you're going to be in for a treat.

The other thing that caught me off guard was the actors.  Rufus Sewell (whom I've only seen as the bad guy in A Knight's Tale) does a splendid job as the lead man Angus.  I'm more interested in his wife Carla Gugino, who I've always thought was just gorgeous.  You might have seen her recently in Watchmen and Race to Witch Mountain.  The rest of the cast is great too.  I thought the acting was pretty good considering what they've got going on.

So the story...it is actually pretty generic for a horror movie.  I think they just made this one to flash off some boobs and have a scary monster at the end.  But that is fine by me.  It takes place in the early 1900s...blah blah blah.  They're part of a side show, come across a crazy old man with a mermaid...oh my!  They steal said mermaid and they're all doomed.  What could possibly be better!  Simple, mindless, and 100 percent entertaining.

This film does what I would call a complete success.  Their portrayal of the mermaid is pretty dead on.  What I mean by that is that she has a fish tail and a human top.  No star fish over the chest in this one.  She's all bare and evilishly beautiful.  I feel sorry for the actress though...all those hours dipped down under water unable to expel bubbles from her mouth and having to keep her eyes open.  No thank you.  In any case the mermaid is cute and is some nice eye candy for the men out there.

The monster at the end is well worth any inconvenience to the viewer.  The plot and story should be enough to keep you in the game but knowing that something badass is going to happen is something that you have to sit and wait for.  For those of you that have played the God of War games, the monster looks like a mixture of the Medusa enemy with the head of the Queen Alien, with the exception of a suckerfish type mouth.  I thought it was quite scary and moved very smoothly while whipping through ship's crew.  Do not want to mess with that bitch.

So should you see it?  Absolutely.  I couldn't tell you how hard to find it is but I found it on vhs and I enjoyed it so definately give it a shot.  It's a perfect rainy/lazy saturday afternoon movie to pass the time.  In any case...it has an evil mermaid in it.  What more could you ask for?