Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The 31 Baddest Days of Halloween: Survival Log Day 19

I was feeling pretty down last night. I got home and checked out my results for the facebook game I've been killing myself over and my numbers are just shitastic. know, you try so hard and it's just not good enough. So I watched Night of the Creeps on bluray and The Evil Dead Ultimate Edition and I felt right as rain. Now this morning, I don't even care anymore. My life is richer now that I've seen...

Imagine an ass. Imagine that ass is 50 feet across. That's a huge volume of ass. Well, The Bloody Ape fucking ninja kicks that much ass.

This movie was made in 1997 but watching it you'd be sure it was filmed in the mid 70s. The picture is grainy and out of focus. The musical score is pretty much organs and some bashing on cymbals. And the sound...oh boy the sound is FULL of static. Honestly, I wouldn't have it any other way. It's a wonderful little old throwback to the drive-in flicks.

Let's talk about how racist this movie is. Everyone gets a piece in this movie. The fat evil white guy, the corrupt jewish rabbi, the black guy, the slutty white bitches, hippies, they all get their comeuppance from the Bloody Ape! This movie sets out to offend...and I'm totally not offended. This is awesome.

And most everyone has really REALLY fake facial hair.

I would classify this as an exploitation movie. The Bloody Ape gets loose and goes around killing people on the street, breaking into houses, rapin chicks, rippin' off hippie's cocks. It's just so fucking awesome. Whenever they show the ape on the screen, they always cut the sound. It's just a crappy old movie score and video. You don't hear the ape growl or any sound effects from the Ape killing people. I really liked that aspect of this movie. It actually added to the fun of it all. And once in a while they'd add in a really fucking weird noise, like when the ape kills the video store owner. The owner goes to the back room and the ape is there, they cut back to the owner and there's this fucking weird noise that's like, WWWRRRHOOOWWERRR. HAAHAHAHAHA YESSS!!

They were even cool enough to add a blooper reel over the end credits. Just awesome.

The Blood Ape, you gotta see this. It's totally not for everyone but if you love sleazy trashy movies, you need to own this shit. You can buy it right here if you like.

Check out the trailer on the website. I can't find an embeddable trailer anywhere. Probably because the trailer is just the Ape killing a chick in the shower.


  1. Hahaha awesome. It was going to either be 100% horrible or amazing, I'm glad it was the latter. That guy's facial hair is terrific, it looks like fun fur from Hobby Lobby.

  2. Thanks. Now you've got me thinking about a huge ape ass!

    (btw, you're first instinct was right, that WAS just some dude in an ape suit beating up women LOL)