Friday, October 28, 2011

The 31 Baddest Days of Halloween: Survival Log Day 28


THREE DAYS TIL HALLOWEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNN!!! I'm so close to finishing out this month. My sanity is teetering on the edge. It's all like, wwwwOOOOOOOO, I can fucking fly motherfucker! Then I reel it in with a giant fishing hook but it keeps pulling. It wants to jump. WHY DOES IT KEEP LAUGHING AT ME? Why would my very own sanity laugh in my face. It's like the Joker.  Maybe I should just let it go. I'm getting tired of keeping it in check. If that stupid fucker is dumb enough to jump, then let him jump.

What's the worst that could happen?

Presenting the final feature voted upon by you, the Reality Readers for
the 31 Baddest Days of Halloween! 

You guys are assholes.



Motorhome Massacre not only lives up to its title but it expands the boundaries of what makes bad....bad. There is so much win and so much fail in this movie that you can't help but smash your fists into your cheeks and look at it in wide eyed wonder. Is this the greatest movie ever? Yes. Is this the worst movie ever? Yes. Will I watch this movie again? Yes. Will I regret it? Yes.

I'm sure you can figure out the story. Group of smokin hot teens, many of them cliches, and ALL of the girls have huge tits, get a motorhome and go for a trip. They get there and then the massacre starts. Also, you get to see boobs.

For every kill that is fucking amazing, there are at least 2 that are just pathetic. Say...the killer ties a rope to a tent and hoists it up into a tree...and then stabs the shit out of the tent. But then not a second later just stabs some dude between the arm and side of the body. UGH! It's so epic and so terrible at the same time. BUT THEY DON'T CANCEL EACH OTHER OUT! Why? I don't know. This movie doesn't play by rules...at least not the rules as I understand them.

You know what, I'm going to say that all of you out there need to see this movie. It's possible that you can use it as a weapon against your friends when their being dicks. But I think it's more possible that you'll be laughing at how stupid this movie is. It's so unintentional but so so good. The finale will blow your mind.

It's love. Love fails us all.



4 comments:

  1. Gable's sanity in that picture needs more flames! MWUHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!

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  2. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

    wait.

    ...


    HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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  3. Chris: That's the split second JUST BEFORE the air/fuel mixture is at optimal flammability. The very next frame is all like, FWOOOOOSSSSHHH!!!

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  4. yeah, it's so epic that I launch into outer space.

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